When It Ends

Hey there!

One of my favorite photos of us <3 

Life has been insanely busy this past few weeks. I was preparing for my internship next semester, working on about 7-8 assignments at a time, and currently studying for my finals next week (19.10.16). I can't believe this semester is going to end already..

Note: The timeline in this post is messed up because I forgot what happened when.

I really wanted to meet up with some high school friends before they have their STPM exam, but now I don't even have the time to reply to them on Snapchat or Facebook these days. I'm on campus seven days a week or meeting up with group mates to work on assignments or film projects. 

Nay, Shern and I were practicing our musical performance on Sunday and Wednesday. We performed "Bubbly" by Colbie Cailat on Thursday (8.10.16) and I think we did okay. Kinda miss doing assignments with Shern because I can't make fun of Imran the way I make fun of him. HAHAHA. Imran doesn't seem to be affected by our (Nay and I) teasing while Shern freaks out in a hilarious way. 

On one of the rare "off" days we had, Eunice, Prahveen, Nay and I went hiking and biking. I woke up at 4 a.m. and played with the cats. Prahveen and Eunice arrived, then we headed to campus to pick Nay up. We had so much funnnnn :3 We met a ton of other hikers (most of whom were middle-aged or older) and talked to them about their exercise routine. One lady told us she was training to hike up Mount. Kinabalu and we were like..."Yeahhh you so much fitter than we are."

The four of us (Pokok, Mangkuk, Bengkok, Bongok) had a ton of fun. We went to Bukit Gasing first, and took the longer trail. SO MANY STEPS on that "natural" staircase, I was scared. I have a slight phobia of missing a step and falling down the stairs, which has happened to me at least three times before. It's even worse when the stairs are uneven and there's nothing to hold onto. The suspension bridge was awesome, even though Prahveen almost got murdered by us for jumping up and down, making it sway like crazy. 

Then we headed to Taman Cahaya, Shah Alam. Cycling downhill feels so carefree and easy, but cycling uphill was torture after the two-hour hike we had that morning. We're planning to go back again one day... but no hikes before that. Prahveen actually dropped to the ground and closed his eyes. It's hilarious because he's the fittest out of all of us. All of us were like "Aiyoh, aiyoh, damn pain" and sitting or lying down on the ground. Prahveen asked us to go for the next Viper challenge and we were like "HAHAHAHA maybe in four years, we will!" 

We met up with Mr. Sara, our lecturer in the first and third semester (IIT and Audio Production) to say goodbye to him because he's going to Australia next month :( He's one of the nicest lecturers we have, and he's really funny. Damn sad he won't be on campus anymore. We went to eat lunch at Devi's Corner in Bangsar. So full afterwards, we could barely walk back to the car. We told Mr. Sara that we went hiking and cycling earlier and he said we should have invited him. Feel sorry for him cause we sweat a lot earlier and were probably kinda stinky.

Photo of Nay's phone while we were taking a photo of ourselves.

Pokok, Mangkuk, Bengok and Bongok.

We're gonna invite the rest of the Mamak gang next time.

Our breakfast at Raju's Restaurant in Jalan Gasing.

Things we do just to take a photo.

Cycling in one of my favorite parks that I've been to for the past ten years.

When we crashed and took a break by the roadside.

We look so fit here. HAHA.

We had lunch at Devi's Corner in Bangsar with Mr. Sara.

Bye Mr. Sara :(

Nelly, Prahveen, Wern Ni, Nicky, Yap, Jun Weng and I went for the LED night run. I don't remember if I mentioned this before and I'm too tired to check. HAHA. We had a ton of fun. They set up mini game areas, and there was one where you kick balls into the holes. I managed to get two goals without even really trying. #perasan #proud. We merepek on Yap about not knowing what merepek is. I miss these people so much. 

Running together from 2015 till now.

Hui Ling asked me for help with editing and adding words onto her PR assignment, which I did. She was really grateful, she gave me a hug and said "Omg, thank you so so much, Maine!!" I feel like I always know what assignments the PR students are doing and what it's like for them because they always ask me to help out even though I'm not even in their class. HAHA. Hui Ling hugged me the other day, in music class, three times before I left the class and said thank you. I was kinda confused and shy, so I smiled and said "Why?" Then she told me Eunice told her I was helping their research group with the methodology section and I was like "No need to thank me lah." But yay, I got hugs. HAHA. 

I spoke to a few people, Lee Hui, Rina, Hui Ling, Nelly, etc. about their internship applications. A lot of them went for 2-5 interviews over the past few weeks and I was amazed. Most of the PR students are going to event management companies because they say it's a lot more exciting and casual than working in a corporate office. It's pretty hard for broadcasting students to dig up companies, but I managed to find this list of production companies in Malaysia which helped a lot. 

I created an online portfolio because I initially planned on applying for internship at some production company and the form asked for a link to one. But it's mostly assignments that we did over the past year. It has a very minimalist design. Nay and I actually had a mini photo-shoot of our own, just to take photos for our resumes. 

This is the homepage. I know, my positioning is so awkward :(

I didn't end up applying because Jeremy offered me an internship with his company and I was like "YASS PLEASE, OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH" in a more polite manner. BUT REALLY, I feel so giddy and grateful about it. AND AND he asked me if I had a friend who would like to intern with them as well so I immediately told Eunice about it. We're going to intern together, AHHHHH. YAY. I am so happy about it. I would have asked Nay first, but I knew she already had an offer that she wanted to accept. I would have asked Prahveen to join us too, but they only had two internship positions available. We're still planning to hang out and everything if we happen to do our internships nearby. Things are going to be so different when we're all interning at different places.. I can't imagine what our final semester will feel like.

I was worried for a while when Jeremy told me that his company isn't active in December. I thought about it and suggested that during that time, the supervisor assigns projects to us, then we send it to him, he gives us constructive feedback on it, we improve upon it and send back the final edited version. We'll also be extending our internship in March..which means we won't have a semester break before our final semester, but I'm okay with that. 

I feel a little sad that I didn't get to use my resume after spending so much time designing it :( I'm relieved that I didn't have to go for interviews though. I'm really excited that I get to intern with Eunice too. I kinda trolled her on Friday (14.10.16). I told her about the potential internship a few days earlier and the issues that I had to figure out before it was confirmed.. On that day, I walked up to her before class with a really serious expression, patted her shoulder and said "I have something to tell you later.. " She said "Oh..okay" Then after class, I went up to sit next to her, and said "Eunice... we got the internship." Really seriously and quietly. She looked shocked for a moment and started laughing before she said "I thought you were going to say something bad! Your expression!" I laughed so hard at her reaction. I'm evil.  

We went for the ETC Film Festival. Also got to meet three guys from the cast of Ola Bola. Us girls were too starstruck to say anything, so we just said hi and stared at them creepily. The screening of The Journey and Ola Bola was great. 

Nay and me.

When we play games, and win prizes.

We're in the middleeee!

Hung out with Eunice, Maureen, Aishah and Rina a few weeks ago, and we were talking about the Palsaik Roadshow event that just ended and joking about how easy it was for Hui Ling to approach guys. Also on how much things have changed from the first semester till now.. our perception of each other and of everyone else, and people turning out to be completely different from what we expected them to be. 

Palsaik girls :)
Aishah, Yazmin, me, Maureen, Ivery, Eunice, Nelly, Lee Hui.

Love this shot Adleen took of us! <3

Why Diana... 
I braided her hairrrrrr :D 
Maureen was like "Oh my god, how did you do that?"
It's weird how I haven't been braiding much (cause lazy) but I haven't lost my knack for it.

Lee Hui's BFF took a photo of me in retaliation for stalking them :3

My hair color was fading, so I redyed it with the pink dye I usually use. I like the transition from dark brown to the purplish pink :3 Everyone was saying they miss the green streaks, but I DON'T. I hope the green isn't there when my hair fades again. Got called Harley Quinn a couple of times by Aishah, Nay, and the rest when I tied my hair in low pigtails. So embarrassed but it made me laugh.

It's a dark purple + pink mixture now. I still kept two small streaks of blue.

This was my previous hair color. I loved it but the turquoise fades to green and I don't like that.

At Subang Lake Park.

I've been wearing tank tops a lot lately. It gets hot when we're out filming.

No more green. Kinda sad but not that much.

With Eunice <3
When we were filming in KL.

Things we do to Imran.

I like this dress.

Photo of the lights I took at KLEFF.

If it rains, just pray that one of the umbrellas falls so you don't have to run in the rain like Eunice and I did.

When we went to Timbre for the Alena Murang Flight EP Launch.
It's a great place for live performances.

Aishah, Rina, Eunice, me (When we went to watch Lights Out)

Wern Ni taught me how to use the printing services through the Taylor's portal on my laptop when I wanted to print out our storyboard. So shameful that I've been in Taylor's for more than a year and didn't know how to do it. Thank you, Wern Ni!! #Fishes

I was hanging out in Starbucks with Eunice and Shern. We were talking about checking girls out (I know, it's weird) and Shern mentioned something like how a certain body shape is attractive, and I said "Yeah but you gotta look at the butt too. It's not as nice when their butt is flat." He said "True that." Then we fist bumped. We continued our discussion about how if someone created a reality show about Shern, the tagline would be "GET REKT" and the title would be "Shern's Gains". 

Kesian Eunice cause Shern was picking on her and I was egging him on because I found it so entertaining. Eunice went to have a group discussion with Prahveen and Yap at a table nearby, so I talked to Shern to distract him from teasing her. He showed me his resume and it had "personal gains" mentioned in the objective. I was like "What if they said: I see here, you've written personal gains..Hmm..could you explain to me what type of gains do you want to gain?" And he was dying of laughter. I don't know why he finds it so funny, but it's hilariously confusing to watch him laugh over it. Eunice said that Shern isn't as annoying if you don't take him seriously, and I agree.

Had lunch with Aishah, Eunice, Rina, Hui Ling and Lee Hui a couple of weeks ago. They talk a lot about what's happening on campus, who's what and does what, etc. which I find enjoyable because I like gossip. HAHA. I talked to Wern Ni and Yi Min about the career fair in Taylor's, and they were telling me about how the experience was. We discussed how difficult it is when the interviewer asks questions which are difficult to answer and you have to come up with a satisfying answer on the spot. It's hard to do that when you're nervous and barely able to remember your own name. I was teaching them how to practice their bs-ing skills. HAHA. 

Emyr sang Hasta El Amanecer by Nicky Jam for his music performance and HE WAS SO GOOD. I was amazed at how smooth the performance was. AND HIS VOICE. AHHH. I helped the guys record him and I was trying so hard not to move my hands too much. Prahveen posted the video on Instagram and wrote this in the caption,

"Shoutout! to my brother@emyrmj for his amazing performance 🙌 A great voice 💕 PM me for bookings & enquiries. Please note that you have to make booking 1 month earlier for us to make arrangements because he will be busy performing in Europe & South America. Emyr Meldon Asia Tour 2016 is finally finished at Taylor's University. Grab your tickets for EMYR MELDON LIVE AT PARIS!! Tickets are selling fast, grab yours now!! [] Song ▪ Hasta Al Amanecer [] #emyr #asiatour #nickyjam#hastaalamanecer #cover #voice#celebrity"

His bs-ing skills too damn good, I tell you.

I went for the Sparties Shorties with Nay and Eunice; we wanted to support Imran (who was acting as Cameron) in one of the plays. I heard someone calling "Maine, Maine!" and turned around to see Mee En. I grinned at her and mouthed "Hiiii". I overheard her saying to her friends that I'm the one in the photos she has from high school. So touched. HAHA. It's kinda sad how we're studying in the same campus but rarely get to see each other. It's not the same anymore either, since it's more of a passing "Hey" than an actual conversation. Hope we get to have a meetup with the rest of our high school friends one day <3 

Prahveen was supposed to fetch me and Eunice to the KTM/Sunway, but Eunice was hungry so we waited for her while she tapau-ed a pancake from JC's Pancakes. I was looking down at some people walking past in the level of restaurants below, and noticed a girl who looked familiar but I was kinda brain dead so I just stared at her. She looked up, waved and said "Mainneeeee! HIIII!" Then I remembered who she was and waved back, saying "Chahanaaaaaa, HIIIIII!!" very excitedly. She noticed Prahveen and said "Hi hi!" He took some time to start saying hi back but he kept repeating it, and I was like "Stop embarrassing me in front of my friend!!" 

We were shortlisted for the Panasonic competition, but it was starting to interfere with our studies and internship preparation, so we discussed this with our programme director and lecturer who told us to inform the mentors of our situation so we did. They told us we had to stick to the set schedule (which we couldn't) or be disqualified, so we couldn't go forward with it because our studies have to be our first priority. I think that while it would have been a great experience, it would have been too much for us to handle and it would have had a detrimental effect on our GPA this semester. And we're all Dean's List students so it's terrifying to imagine how bad our grades would have been in comparison to previous semesters.

I was speaking with Diana after music class on Tuesday (18.10.16) and she was telling me how stressed out she was and about the conflict in her filming team. Nay said "Yeah, we all (the teams) have our own problems." I said "Don't stress out too much okay? Need any help, just lemme know." Diana gave me a hug and Nay joined in. Again, yayyy hugsss. 

I called Eunice when I was at lunch with Nay, her mum and Imran. She answered "Maaineeee!" and I was a bit like "Omg why you so happy?" After talking to her a bit, I figured out why: She was having lunch with Shern. Shern wanted to talk to me, but it was mostly about him comparing Eunice to Hitler and telling me all the things he rather do instead of eat with her. Back to Eunice and she tells me that he's the one who asked her to teman him to Matsuba and I was like "Typical Shern: I hate it, but I love it, but I hate it so much!".  

We screened our trailers for TV Genre and Ms. Shana liked our Kak Leen video! I'M SO PROUD AND HAPPY. The others were able to pinpoint the genre of our show: Crime and comedy. So it was a success. It's hilarious that Imran acted as Aishah at the part where "she" ties the knot of the apron, and Nay was the one running around cause Aishah was only available for the first and last scenes. 

The three of us are very much inclined towards making unconventional videos. Something which Ms. Shana really likes so we usually do quite well in her class. Back in our script writing course, she told us to try not to do cliche stories. We kinda took it to a whole new level, and went on the extreme side of weird in creating videos once we started working together. We were talking about how our last film project, "The Fork" is a happier version of It's Real (I don't think I've mentioned it here before, but yeah it's about schizophrenia). The main character in The Fork is just weird though.

It's Real.

"The Fork" is based on an interesting writing prompt we found, but we twisted it to make it our own story. We were desperate and looking for something that would be easy to film, but not generic. We wanted to create something like The Lunch Date. It wasn't as easy to film as it looked on paper, given the amount of detail we wanted in each shot. 

The Fork.

The Q&A section from the BTS.

I extracted the parts of the BTS where you can see how we function as a team.

We like to say that this film portrays us losing our minds this semester. Just finished my music finals today (22.10.16) and the paper was surprisingly easy. I'm glad that Nay and I went for the revision class on Thursday because it helped to narrow things down and refreshed our memories. We went to Cosans Coffee with Imran to watch X-Files and Fringe for our TV genre analysis paper. Ate salsa chips and drank mango smoothie. I had to make some phone calls, so I went outside for a while. A cat was sleeping on the sofa outside, I patted him and sat down next to him. He started meowing and crawling into my lap, and I was like "Omg, so cute, I cannot resist." Manja-ed him for the next 5-10 minutes. When I went back in the cafe, he tried to follow me and it made me feel so sad to leave him behind. 

He was so cute.

After being there for about 4-5 hours, the WiFi got really bad when more people entered the cafe.. We decided to head to Nay's house and there we stayed till like 10.30 p.m. (for me), watched two episodes of each shows first before starting on the analysis paper. We had about 90% of it done before I went back, I'm waiting for them to finish the rest and I'll be editing it and proofreading it (cause that's what I do..) I like how productive we are and how much fun we have, even if it's frustrating to work together sometimes. 

One of the funniest memory I have is when Nay was Snapchatting, I started making cow-like sounds like "Nuuuughhhhh" repeatedly and Imran responded back with the same kinda sounds till it sounded as though we were conversing and Nay was just like "What the heck is going on?!" Yeah...we kinda lost our minds.

When I K.O.

I studied all day on Sunday, but I kept feeling like I couldn't remember anything. Had two papers today (24.10.16); TV Genre was not that easy at all, even though I came to campus two hours earlier to study beforehand. Had to write an essay on portrayal of teenagers in teen dramas which was the easy part, but I struggled a bit with remembering the definitions in the short answer section; and examples of the common elements in comedy. I think I could get a B to A- for this, based on my assignments and the finals being okay. 

There was a funny chain of sharing notes (that were helpful) going around today. I shared my Marketing Notes with Nay and Imran which helped them remember the answers better, Imran shared an article he found which was relevant to the TV Genre essay with me, Nay's notes on the last question of the marketing paper helped me answer it (cause I wouldn't have any idea how to do it otherwise), my notes on the TV Genre essay helped Nay figure out how to write hers. So yeah, we helped each other out a lot <3 

Went for lunch with Diana and we talked about our internship, this past semester and what we're doing after our programme ends. We talked to Hui Ling and Lee Hui in Starbucks...Diana didn't see them at first and we later told her that they were waving to us when we walked past them on the way to the restaurant we had lunch and she didn't see them that time either. I was like "Oh my gosh, Diana." 

I have a horrible feeling that my GPA is going to drop a lot this semester. Everyone in broadcasting is saying how we're constantly doing one assignment after another (or 2-3 at a time) and feeling like we haven't learned much in class. I don't remember much of the theory, to be honest.  I'm kinda sad but a part of me just doesn't really care anymore. Hoping that I'll still be on the Dean's List so it'll be easier to apply for scholarships for my degree. I just pray I won't get less than a B for anything.

My head feels horribly fuzzy and I feel so dead tired every time I get home. I'm actually in the mood to text people I miss (i.e. high school friends) but I can't focus on what we're talking about. Friends were saying how I look serious and zombie-like when I was studying in Starbucks earlier today. Haih. I can't wait for this to be over. 

Had my Communication Research Methods paper on Tuesday (25.10.16). I was so scared for this one because there was a ton of material to cover. Got to campus at 8.00 a.m. and started studying in the library. Then I went to have lunch before joining Nay and Imran at Aspresso. We went to an empty classroom to study for the next 1 1/2 hours. I focused mostly on the information I extracted from the slides, which I thought would come out because Ms. Judith mentioned it a lot in class. And most of it did come out, so I managed to answer all the questions. 

Stayed back after exams to hang out with Rina, Maureen and Eunice in Starbucks for an hour or so. Spend most of the time talking about our upcoming internships and how our semester has been so far. Eunice and I stayed back for another two hours, just to get some juice and have dinner together while we caught up on the past week. 

Final day of exams. All I remember is making faces at Nicky when he picked on me, Diana telling me I have a nice butt (yah, our friendship weird), Adleen saying "You're so pretty!" when she saw me wearing a crop top (She's very pretty too, btw HAHA So flattered but so shy about it), Eunice and Aishah checking me out when I wore a crop top and making the "She caught us looking!" expression when I approached them. We took photos! But sadly almost half of our class wasn't there unlike last time :( NOOOOO. 


2. Three of us (Diana, Nay, me) smiling.

Gonna miss you guys </3

Went out to have lunch with Nay and Imran. We had a (almost) two-hour discussion about our team and the issues we had. It was hurtful but entirely necessary. I much rather we resolved things instead of keeping it in and getting resentful. We promised to make compromises in our sixth (and last) semester and always have discussions about whatever problems we have with one another. 

When we got back to campus, a bunch of us (Nay, Prahveen, me, Nelly, Nicky, Jun Weng) went to Wern Ni's house to visit her because she caught dengue fever and couldn't make it for the finals. After catching up with her about how she's been, we talked about our internships and everything, Then Nelly took us to a mamak near her house to have dinner, and it was SO GOOD and CHEAP *_* Most of what we talked about was joking about visiting her just to try new food in Kepong, and us planning to have food trips when we're all interning in different places. 

SEM BREAK HAS OFFICIALLY STARTED. I'm still getting involved in projects and going out every now and then. When I'm at home, I usually end up spring cleaning (even tho we no got the spring in Malaysia) a lot. Bros think I'm crazy for doing it but I'm honestly incapable of sitting still nowadays, I still feel the need to be active. 

Nay and I went to visit Imran in the ICU ward in KD. We met his parents in the lobby and talked to his dad for a while before he went to eat. Went up with Auntie Sheli. We had to use hand sanitizer and wear face masks when we went into the room. Oh my god, it's frightening to see him the way he was. We spoke to him.. hope we didn't wear him out too much and manage to cheer him up. He's not actually supposed to have visitors outside of family, but his mum told the doctors that seeing his best friends would make him happy so they allowed it. We communicated through him texting on his phone because he couldn't talk and us talking like normal. Didn't really know what to say but we just talked. 

He was getting tired, so we hugged him goodbye and wished him well. Then we hugged his mum and said goodbye to her. Also hugged each other in the lift because we were both freaking out after seeing him and feeling worried about him. Really hope that he'll get better soon :( When he is, we (along with other coursemates) are planning to visit him. Don't think we're allowed to visit him again while he's still in this condition :( Praying for him tho.

This and That:
Been reading a ton of tech subreddits lately (Apple, Android, Xiaomi, AndroidApps) because it's interesting to learn about the difference in different Android phones, features and platforms. I decided to start backing up all my photos and  videos to Google Drive (or delete them if I didn't want it anymore) and clear out my phone as much as I can. I went from having over 2000 photos in my camera roll to 30 photos. Screenshots went from 400+ to 20+. And I'm still clearing out the other folders I have. 

Recently downloaded a new gallery app (Piktures) and it has a secret (with pin code lock) gallery section to store all the things you wanna hide. I transferred all the selfies (honestly nothing more awkward than people seeing the selfies I take, imo), screenshots, photos of people that don't know I still keep their photos but I do and I don't want them or other people to see and whatever I wouldn't want in the main gallery.   

Apple vs Android:
Had a debate on this while discussing the iPhone 7's features with a friend. (For now) I'm not interested in getting an iPhone because I've learned from my experience with my iPod Touch 5 (which is essentially an iPhone but not a phone at all) that there are some things on Android phones which I just can't live without. 

Namely, the ability to customize the themes through launchers, the layout of the build-in applications, variety of applications on the app store, size and shape of the phone and for some reason, it's easier to type on my Xiaomi phone than on my iPod (typo issues). I just prefer the look and feel of an Android phone overall. Especially with the latest MIUI 8 update which looks way better than MIUI 7. 

1. MIUI 7 - When they separated the notifications and toggle bar.
2. MIUI 8 - Updated and more colorful look.
3. Example of how the toggles bar changes according to the weather.
4. iPod Touch (IOS 10) - Only social media app I use here constantly is Snapchat.

Don't judge the amount of notifications I have ._. I know it's insane. I disabled my Messenger notifications because it was making my phone lag. Does anyone else use Instagram Direct or am I being weird by preferring it to Whatsapp? I still remember the looks of disbelief on Imran and Nay's faces when I said that replying through email is so much more convenient than Whatsapp/Messenger/etc. Started using Telegram recently because my internship company uses it as the primary method of communication. 

1. My phone's lock screen.
2. Home screen.
3. Apps...I don't have an app drawer like I used to (on my Moto G). Don't know if I miss it or not.
4. Camera folder in the Piktures app.

Used to have Nova launcher on my old phone but I'm reluctant to get it now since I do like the current look of my phone. And some of the MIUI 8 features are great/looks interesting and I kinda want to try them out. (I.e. photo/video editing, touch assistant, second space and clone apps.)

Not to say that I hate Apple. I wondered why people say Apple is easy to use, but eventually realize it's because the interface is the same in every iPhone while on Android, the UI differs from brands/themes. The UI is very clean and straightforward once you're used to it. Another upside to having an iPhone is the variety of phone cases that you can get literally anywhere. (Sadly, the same can't be said for an iPod) And I prefer listening to music on my iPod because it's smaller and easier to change and pause songs on Spotify with one hand (The curse of having small hands). 

Wish people will just accept that everyone has different preferences and it's just a matter of what works for you than what is better than what. Then again, it's fun to read rants or stories on when people try out different phones. 

Back up yo data:
Guys, always, ALWAYS back up everything on your phone. I know so many people who've had their phones damaged, and lost everything they have. It's a pain to ask people for their phone numbers because you didn't save it to your Google contacts or SIM card (Hasn't happened to me since 2012) and it's upsetting to lose all the photos and vids you have and can't retrieve ever again. 

Mini Rant on Snapchat:
Friend asked me why I'm not using Snapchat anymore. After Instagram Stories was released, I didn't feel the need to go on Snapchat, especially since I'm on my Android phone more than my Apple device these days and I.S. works well (albeit slightly imperfectly) on it. 

Snapchat is horrible on my phone, even though I'm using the Beta version. The photo quality isn't completely terrible (at least compared to how bad it is on my iPod touch) but the video/filters/etc drives me crazy with how badly it lags. With the ephemeral feature, I don't trust Snapchat to shut down on my phone when I'm reading or looking at a Snap. 

I read a lot of complaints on forums and websites, saying that it's pointless to have Snapchat's disappearing feature on Instagram and etc. but I disagree. It's awesome to have an alternative to an app that never seems to improve, and also my Instagram Story still gets seen by a ton of people (and my targeted audience: close friends). I honestly don't care much about missing out on watching other people's snaps because... it doesn't bother me if I don't know what's going on in people's lives and if they don't know what's going on in mine. #noFOMO. I'm like social media app developers worst nightmare. I do miss the personal Snapchat conversations and I'll probably use Snapchat solely for that someday..when I'm in the mood to.. but I just don't have the time or energy to deal with that now.  

Sometimes I think that my lack of interest in social media disconnects me from my friends.. but honestly, I'd prefer to meet them in person and catch up on their lives than to text them about my day unless they're friends I hardly ever get to see. 

1. This is something which I've always known, but never really thought about deeply until recently. For some reason, I always have extraordinary luck with friendships. I don't know why people like me and want to stay friends with me because I'm extremely flawed when it comes to keeping in contact with them and there are still times when I'm reserved and detached. There are so many people in my life I feel thankful that I met (DD, Mee En, other high school friends, Nay, Eunice, Imran, Prahveen, and literally my whole class and people who aren't in my class, church friends as well), even if we don't speak as frequently as before (mostly my fault, HAHA), I still think about them and remember them fondly. 

What I mean about luck is, I don't always initiate conversations and I'm not always comfortable with people. But through a shared experience or amazingly friendly people who decided to approach me, somehow we inevitably end up being friends and I find myself wondering "How did it even happen?"

Since I left high school, and started working before I went to uni, I gained a new perspective on friendships and people's intentions. I used to take things personally and get offended/angry/upset easily because I felt insecure about myself and didn't think I deserved to have people in my life, which made me take it out on other people. Now I remind myself, "Not everything is about you." Sometimes it could have been me that was the issue, but then I have to decide whether to apologize and talk it out or let it go.  

I've never been the type of person with a ton of close friends everywhere. I've never been the kind of girl who received a ton of attention from social media. I've never been good with relationships and opening up to people. And I've never been the type of person who really cared about it at all. I think I'm learning to accept myself for who I am. 

I still struggle with believing that people care about me, embracing my flaws and showing people that I care about them. But I'm trying. And still learning. 

If you're a friend of mine, I'd like to say thank you for being there for me when you didn't have to. And just thank you for being in my life at all, HAHA. 

2. I've been thinking about growing my bangs out (after like 7 years of having them in different shapes and lengths) and I probably will for the next 5 months over the course of my internship. My friend saw my IC photo from when I was 12 (and had a middle part with no bangs) and he said "Oh my god, is that you?! Doesn't look like you at all." Kinda worried about what I'd look like but I'm craving a change anyway.

Anyway,till next time!

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Maine Lyn. Chinese Malaysian. Aspiring writer, photographer and videographer.